*June.11.2004*

Afternoon:

I know the other day I came on here with pent up anger about all the things that had gone wrong in my day. On the contrary, today I wanna talk about how good God has been to me. That Wednesday, June 9th, when I came on here venting my frustrations, I went to bible study that night (sidenote - told yall I was gonna pray about it). Anyways, between that night and right now, things have been really good. We got the apartment, I get paid on the 15th, thank the Lord, and today I wanna express my feelings about "post-mid-march" (click for info on mid-march).

Where do I begin....Ok! For reasons that would constitute breaching a womans rights, I won't use names. Girl A - I met her back in February, strickly through associations. She is an extremely nice person and is doing rather well for herself. But when we met, I was in a relationship and it was and has been always, just friends (no extras.) Well lately, she has been pushing the issue about "us", post mid-march, taking our friendship to another level. Well, I think she is cool and all, but I think that we are totally at two different stages in life. I mean we can't really communicate about issues well....especially spirituatlity, which is one of my non-negotiables. So I want to preserve the friendship, but not crush the association, ya know what im saying? Girl B I just met her, like maybe two/three weeks ago.....and from what I know of her, well lets just say that she is what I look for in a variety of ways. Yet the screwed up part is at this point in my life, I can't even begin to come off to her in that manner. These days I seem to busy trying to work on me that, I can't even begin to bring someone in....I want to, but I want to be able to be equally yoked with a woman. Which means she and I really have to be at the same level. Well, those two are really the only two people that really have my attention. I dont know what God has for me, but I'll keep my spiritual eyes open and I'm quite sure that he will show me.