Ignorance/Bliss

July 27, 2004

My initial plans were to sit down at work today and post on my blog, but as you can clearly see, that didn’t happen.  So I came home, cleaned my room, which I neglected this morning after sleeping in an additional 10 minutes more than I use to, cleaned the rest of the apartment, and proceeded to sit down and in a sense “talk to myself via blog.”  Its different using Word to type my blog, because I don’t feel like I have an audience until I actually post it to the webpage. 

Today is marking the rejuvenation period in my life.  I got a huge burden off of my shoulders today.  After 81 days of none contact, I broke down and emailed “mid-march!”  To most and many who read this, it won’t really serve as an impact, but to the few whose eyes stumble across this blog, it will mean much more.  I told her how I felt about the past, and how things in our lives back then just weren’t where they needed to be for the fulfillment of a quality and fruitful relationship.  I do miss the person, but I can deal with missing the person and not having the additional stress that is tabbed onto the friendship. 

I am not the one to gossip, as you can probably tell from my previous posts, but this dude really irked the mess outta me today in the office.  Aight, you know I’m just co-oping while I’m in grad school……well numnut decides that he wants to come and flaunt his new office computer.  Dude come all the way to my office, “INSERT CONVERSATION”:

Dude:  Hey man, come here, I wanna show you something!

Me:  :thinking: wth?  Whats up man?

Dude:  I just got this new desktop dual monitor computer in my office! :Smiling like an Uncle Tom:

Me:  Must be nice (trying to sound UNinterested)…..

Dude:  You know you just a Co-Op, so they don’t care what kind of computer you have!! (In a sarcastic, I’m better than you kinda way)

Me:  :thinking: wth? :tryin to be humble:  Nice Computer man….its all good, mine is coming…(blessing, not computer)

*Dude, dumb already, just sits there and begins to run off at the mouth about all the new features and how he can now download music and stuff…..meaningless stuff….and he’s older than I am, go figure*

So here is the gig. Dude been at the job, full time for over a year now.  Keep in mind he is black.  His job title is Manager Trainee, which basically means they don’t want to give him free will because they don’t trust him.  And Im really not hatin, cause it’s the truth.  I’ve heard it from the horses mouth.  Needless to say, he has been passed over several times by “other” folx for positions and is still “stuck” in that same position.  It also doesn’t help that he is a Kappa (I refrain from saying Nupe, cause I think the dude papa as they come, but oh well).  Anywho, people like that make me wonder about folx these days.  Is it really a me against the world for most black folx, or are there still some decency left among us.  I mean we could have had that same conversation, but without the put down about me being a Co-Op ya know?  Besides, the truth of the matter is…I could do his job and mine too, its just that my degree was in Physics and his in Civil Engineering which is the degree that they look for.  But a kid outta highschool can learn to survey.

Ok. Im tired.  Holla back tomorrow.